I'd consider myself bisexual in the most literal interpretation of the word - I love to have sex with both men and women. It was just before I met my current partner (male) that I began experimenting with women - and wow, what magic! However that ceased with my new monogamous relationship.
My partner and I are very open about our sex fantasies. Alas, we have discussed the possibility of bringing along a female guest into the bedroom - both for my sake and his. While I feel that this could be such an exciting and enjoyable mutual experience for us both I am concerned about the potential for there to be some emotional repercussions afterwards, mainly because many couples who opt for threesomes do not come out intact. I suppose it's merely an expectation that I should be feeling jealousy. I'm also wondering how we can practise safe sex (mainly against STIs) if my partner is vaginally penetrating us both. My partner and I are both STI free, so it's mainly the 'guest' we'd be concerned about.
I'd be so interested to hear if you've had such an experience. Moreover, what is your opinion on group sex? Can it really work?
Dear A,
If either one of you have any jealous tendencies, a threesome can be problematic. One way to see this is which one of you wanted to be a monogamous couple? That person will be the weak point. Usually it's the female spouse who feels competitive toward the new woman because unfortunately many husbands are too interested in the new pussy which re-enforces the concerns of the Mrs.
As for safe sex, everyone has their own preference for handling this. Some simply discuss it, others share their latest test reports and most rely on using condoms and changing them between partners. There are no set rules. My first rule was if we were to share a threesome with one of my girlfriends, I would expect to do the same with a male friend of my partner. Some folks prefer anonymity but with our cautious public focused on disease, it's best to know the person you bring into your bedroom.
My take on group sex was extremely positive but that was in a different time socially. I suggest you get my sexual memoir for detailed info about my fabulous sex life during the end of the sixties throughout the seventies. Good luck with your experimentation.
Dr. Betty
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